Saotos One-Shot Sammlungen   von Saoto
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                Kapitel 3: Discrepancy (Russia & China) (engl.)
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„Hallo, I’m Russia.“, he said.
China turned around. 
There was a young boy standing behind him. He was small and thin, his hair was
sandy and his eyes were shining in a deep blue color. 
It was the first time he had met him.
But still there was something in the eyes of the young boy that attracted him
– something that made him think he’d known the boy for a long time.
Something… he had already seen before.
There was loneliness in the boy’s eyes. Like it was in his own.
“What… do you want, aru?”, the Asian asked, not sure what to say to the
boy who was looking at him with sad looking eyes.
It was like they were going to break into thousands of shards.
“…Nothing.”, he said with a calm, emotionless voice. And his eyes filled
with tears. 
The tears ran down his cheeks, but the boy’s facial features didn’t change a
bit. He was hurt. Hurt because of nothing. 
Because there was nothing. Nothing in his heart.
China was surprised, but because of the boy’s sad gaze he contained himself.
“You said ‘nothing’, but you’re lying, aru.”, China vocalized the
obvious.
Then he put his arms around the young boy.
“Don’t cry, aru. You’re not alone.”
The boy’s eyes widened in astonishment. 
“Really?”, he whispered in the ear of the older Asian.
“Really.”
“So…”, the young boy asked, resting his head on the Asian’s shoulder,
“Do you love me?”
The boy’s words raised China a smile.
“I do, aru.”, he answered reassuring.
He wanted him to feel welcome. To feel accepted.
Russia closed his eyes and smiled.
It was the first time he was smiling.

Years had gone by, and Russia had grown up. He wasn’t the innocent, young boy
China had met back then anymore. He wasn’t the child with the calming smile,
the child that wanted to be loved.
He had become a cruel man.
China didn’t even know when exactly the boy had changed into the monster he
was now. He never realized that Russia had changed… until it was too late.
The old Asian peered through the window glass, searching for something he
didn’t even know himself. Somehow, he still hoped that the young boy, the
innocent child, would come back some day; he would run through his garden, trip
over the stones, stand in front of his door, smiling, and saying: “Good
morning, brother.”
Deep in his heart China knew that the young boy would never come back anymore.
The boy was dead. He had been killed – by that cruel, heartless being he was
now.

“Hallo, China.”
China didn’t turn around.
He knew this voice too well. He already knew who it was.
It was the man, the guilty, dreadful man he didn’t want to know anymore.
“What… do you want, aru.”, he asked, and his voice was shaking – because
of fear; because of sadness.
“…Nothing.”, the man said, smirking.
He walked over to China, turning his arms around the Asian, and snuggled his
face against the elder’s neck.
China shivered. He wanted to push the man away, but he couldn’t. He still had
to think of the innocent boy that was hurt so easily.
Maybe, just maybe… he was still there, somewhere in the depth of the man’s
soul. Somewhere… there…
“…You are lying, aru. I know it.”
But the man just rose his head and continued to smirk, smiling the fakest smile
China had ever seen before.
“You hurt my feelings, China.”, the man said, kissing the Asian’s neck
with his lips which were cold as the snow the man was used to.
“What if I cry now? Won’t you hug me then?”
China bit his lips in order to stop himself from saying something foolish. Even
if the young boy wasn’t there in the depths of the man’s soul… he didn’t
want to hurt him. 
“China, you’re alone.”, the man mumbled, smiling devilish, “There is
no-one in the world who accepts you the way you are right now. No-one but me,
da.”
The Asian bit his lips again, this time for stopping the pain in his heart.
He knew the man was right. There really was no-one who accepted him. Even his
brothers and sisters had turned their backs to him. No-one even paid him a visit
anymore; no-one wanted to be his friend; no-one told him “It’s alright.
You’re fine as you are”. No-one.
“Really…”, China whispered, trying to stop the tears which were falling
down from his face and left dark, brown spots on the other man’s cloak.
 “China.”, the man said, still smirking, “You’ll never get away from me,
da.”
Never. In his mind, the older repeated this word ever and ever again. This
single word meant anything, and it meant nothing at the same time. 
He’d never be alone – and he’d never be free again.
It was his fault. All his fault. Just because he loved the young boy back then.
Just because he wanted to help him.
Because of this, no-one could ever help him.
Russia would never ever let him go.
China turned around and looked at the man. Back then, he was so small, so
innocent, so cute.
And now he was tall, forceful, powerful. Stunning and cruel at the same time. 
China felt like he was going to cry once again. 
Why had the young boy changed that much?
“Where have you gone, young boy, aru…?”, China whispered, clinging his
fingers into Russia’s cloak.
But Russia ignored the elder’s words and continued to smirk.
“China.”, he said, raising the Asian’s head with his hand and looking deep
into his eyes, “Do you love me?”
Now the words had a different meaning. Very different from back then.
China closed his eyes and felt the regrets growing in his mind.
“I do, aru.”, he lied.

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